Yes, I ran away from a retreat

It wasn’t for me. The wooden pillow and sleeping bench was okay. I was even getting used to not eating from 1pm to 8am. I sorted out my posture and I was able to sit for about an hour… but it just wasn’t right. Maybe it was following such a rigid schedule? Maybe it was the fact that I couldn’t still my mind for long? I don’t know. I was reassured that my mind would be stilled through practice and patience, and this I believe, I just felt empty being there, not the kind of Buddha empty that I think they were going for either.

I still don’t think I’ve worked it out but I’m really glad I’m out of there. I stayed in the Monastery for a while, and I loved it there, but that retreat was a bit intense. I’ll see if I can find a Youtube clip of walking meditation, it will make you laugh.

When I left one of the teachers (who like to be called ‘Friends’) told me that I was running away from my problems and that I was wasting an opportunity. Now, I don’t have to be a Social Worker to know that that was a mean thing to say to someone running away from a retreat, or that saying something like that was unlikely to encourage me to stay. Nonetheless I left, and I feel Free!

  

Have a look at this page to see the retreat through the eyes of Sonnet and Ann, just in case you thought I was making it all up... http://www.crazyguyonabike.com/doc/page/?o=RogkL&page_id=140490&v=1T